The music industry and The Sherman Anti Trust Act have been going toe-to-toe this week. The most recent incident is a juicy allegation of price fixing amongst Guitar Center, Gibson, Fender, and other manufacturers. Guitar Center is more or less synonymous with price gouging so there’s no surprise there. Gibson is now run by an egomaniacal lunatic and, a few months ago, had its Nashville headquarters raided by the feds for allegedly importing some endangered wood from Madagascar. So, again, not a lot of raised eyebrows when those assholes are named in litigation. The inclusion of Fender on the list intrigued me at first until I remembered this tid-bit: I bought a new Telecaster last year on credit with the promise of 0% financing for an entire year. I did what any rational person did and paid Fender $0 for the next 11 months. Now February is approaching and they’re gonna tack on a bunch of interest if I don’t pay the balance in full. I’ve spoken with friends, family, and a few bankers and they all assure me this is normal and I’m a dumbass. Well who’s the dumbass now? The gig is up, Fender! I know all about your price fixin’…free Teles for everyone (or just me)!
While the FTC is busy getting their panties wet over $900 guitars, the Justice Department has found that the proposed merger of Ticketmaster and Livenation does not present a threat of monopolization to the live music industry. Really? TM and Livenation, as separate corporate entities, were already snugglin’ up uncomfortably close to Miss Monoply in their respective fields. Now we’re supposed to believe that the combination of the largest ticket seller and largest venue booker is supposed to alleviate the problem? Call me a cynic, but I’m pretty sure that’s way fucking off base. There’s a lot of details and contingencies and yada yada yada but whatever. I may not be a Supreme Court Justice or anything but I live with a Vanderbilt Law student and scored in the 92nd percentile on the LSAT. I’m pretty sure those two tid bits qualify me to call a spade a spade and call bullshit on this merger.
To top it all off, Christine Varney of the DOJ insists that as a result of the merger “we will see [ticket prices] come down.” How many times did she have to practice that line in the mirror before she could say it without going into hysterics and messing her pant suit? I know I sound bitter but trust me, I’m pretty much VIP at any show I want to go to anyway, so I’m fighting for you guys, not me. I’m a man of the people…as long as I don’t have to rub shoulders with those people. They’re generally poor and carry communicable diseases.
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